Ha! You’re not wrong.

But I only packed these sweatpants :(

God, what a choice. Catholicism or the British. Holy shit.

Awww, I miss geocities. I was all over that shit in middle school.

Thank you, that’s awesome

FUCK.

But, like, what happened?

When I was a kid, my grandmother worked at one of the Catholic churches where the priest had been accused of sexually abusing children. I had been to this church, shaken this man’s hand.

During this time, my grandma appeared on the news, wildly pleading, “He’s a good man! He did nothing wrong!” I remember my father’s crazed laughter as he manically searched for a VHS tape to record the scene.

I get regular cravings for papaya. I am a masochist.

Not if they can convince people that his conviction is some kind of liberal plot to silence him.

That’s a good one. Ass clown is also good.

Large

Experience the luxury of JERBCHEST

“It’s”

Doesn’t everybody?

I’ll get my gloves

Nothing here is cheap.

My dumbass Republican father wants to do away with USPS entirely and rely solely on existing private businesses, such as FedEx or UPS.

He lives in Tucson, AZ. So, not exactly country. But he’s fucking stupid.

Aww, neat!

I am an idiot.