toeknee

beans, beans, they’re good for your heart the more you eat, the more you fart

cue all the D’Amro Land jokes

the Super Bowl is just a bunch of burly guys pressing tightly against another group of burly guys trying to prove who is best at handling balls all to win jewelry and a purse.

don’t forget back room deals!

if this guy was still in charge, he’d probably encourage more people to travel to the games because “seats might become available suddenly”

I think removing their union protections (I’m a union member and I don’t think they should be afforded the same types of protections since they’re not labor, they’re the armed section of government who are the only ones allowed to use force on the citizens) and making them carry insurance would be a start. Then, moving their budget to do something about the fact that so many of their calls are to deal with mental health crises which they’re not trained for. Plus, for as large as their budgets are, I’d expect better results in solving crimes. Lots of police departments average something like 25% solve rate which includes things like when people turn themselves in.

I hope all their future meals taste like piss and flies

I like how the AP describes it as “scrapes on his head” and the whiny bastard claimed he was “literally lynched” at the protest. People like him deserve much worse than what he got

I had it easy teaching my daughter to drive - she was naturally cautious so if anything I only ever had to remind her to speed up. We live in a small enough city that I never even did that unless there was traffic behind her. I let her learn at her speed (and then sent her to driving school to get that discount on insurance). No yelling or extra stress required

it’s about someone who can’t make long term memories. The scenes are put together in basically backwards order and people tend to leave their first viewing confused

am I supposed to believe that those cans are holy hand grenades?

that would require reading which, obviously my brain decided wasn’t required in this thread. :(

I misread your original question lol yeah you’re right.

I thought it was the funniest thing when I visited Chicago that while driving, nobody moved to the right lane for police cars but everyone moved over for fire trucks and ambulances.

no, because this one is obviously lying, so the other one tells the truth. (or as the riddle is normally solved, you know the answer is false because no matter which you ask, they’ll end up giving you the wrong answer)

not to mention, I saw a news report where people went to the parade just because of their ties to the army, and not to see the presidential nonsense.

Their clothes always have the logos of their donors on them. The bigger the donation, the bigger, and more prominent the logo.