Oooh, I know this one…

Fuck all!

Being a cunt

Fuck off mate

Oh no. Anyway…

Ha

No we didnt

For a shitpost?

What a handsome chap

Yeh, we’re still in prime Princess Diana season

Same. I have had to buy a Tile device so I can buzz my keys from my phone. Game changer.

You eat it with your mouth, someone else will be along to tell you how to cook it

No-one in the UK goes to a restaurant for breakfast

Art of the deal, baby!

I’m a Brit. I was in Italy recently, and oh my fucking god, American girls are so fucking annoying. I’m sure they are as sincere as anyone, but the many conversations I overheard sounded so basic and vacuous.

It got to a point where I was convinced the same group of early 20-somethings were going to all the same places that we were.

The country was founded on the principle that the primary role of government is to protect property from the majority

• and so it remains

Pics or it didn’t happen

Brie, bacon, redcurrant jelly on a crusty baguette. Heaven.

You have hair teeth?

Threateningly chubby?

The Netherlands is also flat as fuck.