Dingus_Khan [he/him, they/them]

This, and try to destroy or lose equipment. Just the pettiest shit I can get away with

I can’t believe famous popstars all demanded their regular fees and didn’t volunteer their time for a candidate they were enthusiastic about. Absolutely shocked and stunned I say

Half the state is a desert though. Washington truly is a land of contrasts

I too feel sorry for Chasten

He’s fuckable if you wanna fuck him!

Just for some amount of levity, a tale of Halloween past: the year one of my friends dressed in a banana costume and threw bananas at people while another friend dressed as a gorilla and chased him and we all drunkenly chortled

It’s like she used a monkey’s paw to wish to win, then tried to use it again to cancel out the horrible unintended consequences, leading to more drastic consequences. Somehow the paw has more fingers than can be counted and she won’t stop trying

Please let this become a new election time tradition

I’ve seen so many weird custom made yard signs this year. Most of them are for actual candidates or at least the party generally, but several are just (trying to be) funny spoofs. The best one I’ve seen so far is “I’M AN ASSHOLE! Not running for anything, just wanted my own sign” which is so dumb it caught me off guard

Also in the movie one of the main characters has a very racist nickname that they all insist on using

“Oh geez, sorry didn’t mean to interrupt!”

Also applies to accidentally disturbing a cat while they’re licking their butt, when they look up and give you the withering stare

Lol you got me

Boys will be boys

I want to emphasize that this was the most platonic underpants thumb wrestling you can imagine. Get your mind out of the gutter!

Sitting on the couch with my lovely Dr. Partner watching a movie. I got bored for a second, put my hand down my pants and stick my thumb out of the fly on my boxers. We make eye contact, I start wiggling my thumb and going “deedle deedle deedle.” With almost no hesitation they do the same thing and then we proceed to sort of thumb wrestle through our undies while going deedle deedle and laughing like mad.

So anyway, get yourself a person that will underpants thumb wrestle with you while you both provide a soundtrack of deedles is my general relationship advice

Me either really, I only really usually enjoy them cooked. But I grew up in a place where cukes and tomatoes were a common side dish so they somehow get a pass despite my hypocrisy

Make you learn for vinegar and tomato?

Tabbert if they’re a tabby